37 Natural Highs

1. Laughing till it hurts
2. A special glance or wink
3. Getting snail mail
4. Hearing your favourite song on the radio
5. Lying in bed - listening to the rain outside
6. Luxury warm towels on the towel rail
7. Finding the top you really, really want is in on sale for half price
8. Chocolate of any kind
9. A long distance phone call on Skype with video
10. A bubble bath
11. Giggling
12. A good conversation
13. Any beach - anywhere
14. Finding money in a pocket or purse that you had forgotten all about
15. Skipping through Autumn leaves
16. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all
17. Having someone tell you that you're beautiful – say hello gorgeous to yourself too!
18. Falling in love… Your first kiss
19. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you
20. Making new friends or spending time with old ones
21. Playing with a new puppy or kitten
22. Having someone play with your hair
23. Waking up from a sweet dream
24. Swinging on swings
25. Cuddled up on a coach with someone you love
26. Finding the song lyrics printed inside your new CD
27. Running downhill
28. Making eye contact with an attractive stranger
29. Winning a really competitive game
30. Preparing food with friends in the kitchen
31. Just holding hands with someone you care about
32. Meeting an old friend and realizing that some things never change
33. Hugging someone you are fond of
34. Laughing at yourself
35. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open your special gift to them
36. Watching the sunrise…or the sunset…
37. Jumping out of bed every morning and giving thanks for another beautiful day

Let me know your favourites…and please add more ideas on comments

My extra special favourite today is:

Counting ‘sleeps’

When we have special events in our lives we have developed the childhood habit of counting sleeps and get ups. Catriona is home in just six sleeps. I cannot believe that it is over twelve months since she left for her gap year in Australia. Keep the attitude of a child and look for the natural highs in your life…you will become a ‘people magnet!’…and people will always want to spend time in your company.

Have fun today…I know I will!

SSSS

I was chatting to Sarah on Skype yesterday and she typed, “My personal question today is: Did you think of your son when you wrote the blog today?” and I replied “LOL! Work life balance? Our Kyle!” - as Kyle seems to be living his life at work at the moment.

Kyle and Sarah got engaged last year.We fondly refer to Sarah as Triple S her nickname stands for Super Sexy Sarah and my future daughter-in-law and I get on so-o well. Sarah is a star! She is in her final year of psychology and we sometimes wonder if she initially chose Kyle as a case study! You see Kyle has a passion for computers and at times almost to the exclusion of everything else. He currently works in the IT industry as a framework architect. This is a new position in Dublin and his challenge is that he does not seem to know, when to leave the office and turn himself off. Ever since birth he has been able to function on just five or six hours of sleep. When he is focused on something he often carries on till he literally keels over. In fact, I have known him to be so reluctant to sleep that as he puts his head on the pillow, he gives an instruction to his sub-conscious mind to find a solution to his problem! (And it invariably works too!Wow!) So Sarah’s comment on the well-being blog entry was very apt. We are all keen to help keep his life balanced and yet he seems oblivious to our appeals.

Do you know someone who loves their job…and seems to spend too much time there? It can be as much a problem for the loved ones, partners and friends as it is for the overzealous worker. In the case of our son, his focus, drive, energy and determination are all admirable, however at times we fear for his health, sanity and personal relationships.

Our solution is we never give up loving and supporting Kyle and at the same time organising things around him so that he has to stop…

In his defence, he does know what he is doing. He maintains that is work style is only while he is developing his career. And to be fair, he does take time off and can play just as hard as he works – for example, when he asked Sarah to marry him, he arranged a long weekend for them in a romantic location. He flew her in from Frankfurt and he arrived from Spain to stay in the most beautiful hotel in Venice. And he proposed to her on her birthday, with champagne, chocolate and flowers in the Jacuzzi!

I guess we can forgive him just about anything now can’t we girls?

We can all live a life off balance for a period of time and suffer no serious repercussions in health and well being, however it is vital that we do a check up from the neck up and ask ourselves…. ‘Why am I doing this?’

You may have noticed the the blog title was SSSS…Kyle now lovingly refers to his Sarah - SSSS – wonder what her amended nickname means? Any suggestions?

Work Life Balance

A new UK study shows that the majority of owners and directors of small businesses are taking far less leave each year than senior staff in larger organisations. Directors of small businesses say they can’t take two week holidays because their business needs them in the office, they need to be in work to make important decisions or they might miss out on new business opportunities. For those that do make it away, keeping in-touch with the office is still part of the package.

A recent BT "Business Office Anywhere" study found that 39% of owners and directors in businesses with up to 10 employees take 15 or less days holiday a year.

Here is a quote from my web site - "By 2020, W.H.O. (World Health Organisation) predicts that depression (and stress related illnesses) will be the second biggest health issue next to heart disease.
We live in a society, where we have become willing slaves to our work place and many are struggling in this hectic environment to find balance and peace of mind.
Stress in the workplace is at an all time high. We live in a society where emotional distress is at epidemic proportions."

I have developed my speaking and coaching services to offer corporate programmes in response to a tremendous need to create working environments that are stimulating, rewarding and balanced.

Let me share a few snippets with you now:

1. List your personal commitments in order of importance - family, extended family, friends, relaxation, hobbies or leisure activities.
2. Break your working day down into categories such as business development, internal meetings, client liaison and so on. Make a comprehensive list.
3. Allocate time to each activity in point 2 (include weekends).
4. Look at the big picture. Regardless of whether you think you have any choice, are you devoting too much time to work at the expense of your personal life? If you are and this is causing you anxiety, it’s time to act. Think about what your ideal work-life balance would be.
5. Look for a mentor/business friend/coach for input
6. Set realistic goals. If you work 12-hour days, it’s unlikely you’ll be able to change to eight-hour days straightaway. However, improved time-management can enable you to finish earlier - then reward yourself!
7. Be selfish with every second. Stop doing things that are a waste of your time. Rationalise it and use your time to the maximum benefit.
8. Improve your habits. We all make to-do lists... Now create stop lists i.e. stop checking email every hour – check it 9am and 5pm... stop watching so much television... stop that extra glass of alcohol...
9. Delegate tasks to others - learn to let go. If you work alone, consider outsourcing some of your management activities to external suppliers.
10. Remember to take regular breaks. Removing yourself from the location for some fresh air will make you less stressed, more focused and productive.

Six Survival Strategies

Do you live too much of your life in the fast lane? If so, then you consider adopting today’s Six Survival Strategies. Having just spent a very hectic weekend on the motorway, I had an insight into what it must be like to be a modern day road warrior. Here are tips to add to your survival toolkit:

1. Take time to escape to the country – for me a long walk in the woods is an essential part of my life. Visit the Scottish Highlands that is the ultimate retreat – and on a daily basis ensure you create walking time. Make it a routine, a part of your life….
2. Cycle every day – there are a host of benefits. Like me you could just cycle for fun and fitness or you could consider biking to work… If this appeals to you then visit cycle solutions for good advice http://www.cyclesolutions.co.uk/employee.htm
3. Light a candle and run a warm bath…even better let someone prepare the bath for you. It is so relaxing to lie and soak in the bath. Make your bath time fun – relive pleasures of your childhood and spoil yourself…let’s go tubbin!
4. Find a mentor or Coach – the dictionary describes word mentor as: a trusted friend, counsellor or teacher, usually a more experienced person. Many of the world's most successful people have benefited from having a mentor/coach and so can you…

Factoids:

Richard Branson was mentored by Freddie Laker

Aristotle mentored Alexander the Great

Heath Ledger was mentored by Mel Gibson

Eddy Merckx (five-time Tour de France winner) mentored Lance Armstrong (seven-time Tour de France winner)

5. Seek honesty in your life. Is truth an integral part of your repertoire? Avoid what I euphemistically refer to as ‘bovine scatter’. Superficially, honesty means simply, stating facts and views as best one truly believes them to be. It includes both honesty to others, and to oneself and about one’s own motives and inner reality. Be wary of self deception. Be very conscious of what you say in the next few hours…are the statements essentially true? Being honest is liberating…

6. Giggle and laugh a lot…this is sounds so simple and yet it is so good for you. Laugh till your sides hurt and learn to laugh at yourself. My niece, Tracy gave me a lovely compliment, she said, ‘Eilidh one of the things I admire about you is your willingness to laugh at yourself!’ Don’t take yourself too seriously. Go and have a good old giggle…works wonders!

Life in the Fast Lane

As I came racing down the M6 this evening (observing speed limits of course) I observed life from the fast lane and made a decision that tonight I would chill and slow down.

It has been a fantastic weekend! However the combination of high emotions and hundreds of miles of driving equals exhaustion. Have you ever felt like this?

I have planned my blog topic for you tomorrow – however the decision for this evening is to sit and chill and relax…sometimes we have to consciously move out of the fast lane and take a well earned rest…

A bientot!

Multiple Choice

Another of Barbara’s fridge magnets says, “The Ten Commandments are not multiple choice!” How true…

The theme of the sermon this morning was that we should dismantle walls and barriers; to bring about change with a turnaround in our thoughts and actions and make to day a day of understanding.

How many of us are struggling to understand what is going on in our civilised society, when we read about the tragic death of young Rhys Jones?

For seven years, I was an external facilitator for the constabulary and one of my main tasks was to address the perception of crime. The Government may well wish to reassure us through whatever statistical sophistry now available, that the chances of becoming a victim have somehow lessened; however in my experience the public are not convinced.

The double tragedy is that fear eats away at our soul - and it puts double locks on our hearts. We need to learn to trust again and be liberated from worry distrust and fear. And take action...

Perhaps a positive outcome from the ghastly death in Liverpool is that we all elect to make contribution, regardless of how small and look up from the pavement and speak out - and back others who do. Our parents and grandparents have done far more dangerous things than tell sulking youths not to kick over dustbins or drop litter.

On a more practical note, could we be involved in projects to help and support families– such as my good friend Jane, who works with the Home Start programme…(Google Home Start or Sure Start for more information)

Let’s all look to see how we can dismantle walls and start a turnaround in our own communities today…

Eilidh in Edinburgh - PSA

Speaking at the Grosvenor Hilton in Edinburgh last night for the Professional Speakers Association was a pleasure – spending time in the company of likeminded people is always worthwhile and rewarding. There were so many good tips and advice for speakers at all levels. I will certainly be taking on board the tips from Mr PSA Edinburgh aka Kenny Harris. And actioning Garry's Google Alerts idea later this week.

“Professional Speaking is all about making a living from speaking - turning your skill as a speaker into a profitable business. No matter what your current experience ... from 'new entrant' to seasoned and successful international keynoter, the PSA can help you take your business to the next level and beyond” Why not get even more information from the website: http://www.professionalspeakers.org/

However, right now the skirl of the bagpipes is calling me home to Dunoon for the Cowal Highland Gathering. - the world's largest and most spectacular Highland Games. http://www.cowalgathering.com

In haste, aye as, Eilidh

Silver and Gold

Arthur's Seat is an extinct volcano that looks out over the Firth of Forth. It is relatively easy to climb and the panoramic view is well worth the effort. And this is where I started thinking about my blog posting for you today, as I am up in Edinburgh on business. In the distance, I can see the inky calligraphy of the cranes - the city appears stencilled and scribbled below me in the early morning light.

Did you ever learn the song with the chorus, "Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold?"

Well I can speak to strangers in supermarket queues and have a new friend in a matter of minutes...I guess I subscribe to my mothers belief - that a stranger is just a friend that you haven't met yet.. However, I never forget the value of old 'golden' friends.

Do you keep in touch with people who matter in your life? It is vital to have networks of family and friends and to stay in touch regularly. I do urge you to make contact today with someone that you haven't spoken to for a while. It will renew the bond and probably make their day into the bargain.

Barbara Robertson and Jane McLaren and I go back decades...and boy did we have a lot to catch up on last night. My aim is always to do business and pleasure when I am on a trip away. We had so much to talk about that, thanks to Jane, we have planned a renuion in early May next year. We will escape to the Cairngorms; to Rothiemurchus Lodge to be precise. We were all there with a skiing party from GSUOTC back in the early 70s. In fact, this is where I met my husband - the gorgeous ski instructor - more of that anon.

I adore the Scottish Highlands and when I return I always ask myself , "Why did you stay away so long?" It is the ultimate escape to have time to walk and talk and think ...and contemplate fresh challenges.

I love fridge magnets - and here is my favourite from Barbara's collection - Real women don't have hot flushes, they have power surges!

So, regardless of your age and stage in life take the power you have in your hands today and move forward...

Just phone that good friend first! And maybe plan a reunion - I am looking forward to ours already!

Survivor with Spirit

I have several spontaneous clients… they just decide on the spur of the moment to call for an appointment…and I always do my best to accommodate them. Sue is one of those customers. Let me briefly tell you Sue’s story…

Sue has beaten cancer. She had a partial mastectomy a couple of years ago and had all the horrid, invasive surgery that goes with that treatment. Her family history of cancer puts her at risk, so the hospital has been carrying out genetic testing. The findings have concluded that she has an 80% chase of contracting cancer in her other breast and voluntary removal has been recommended.

Can you imagine what this must feel like? I can’t. My heart goes out to the girl.

And yet she is so brave and carries on…she carries on with other challenges in her life too – her husband was made redundant and was out of work for nearly twelve months. He has only just recently returned to work; with all this turmoil in her life Sue has had to be the main breadwinner and mother of two young children.

She came to me for her session and I only hope that I managed to cheer her and support her in her decision, the decision that …on Monday…yes on the Bank Holiday when we are all out enjoying ourselves with friends and family, she will be attending Christie’s Cancer Hospital in Manchester. Sue is electing to have a full mastectomy.

Her comments to me were so brave, “This way Eilidh, I am in control…not the cancer. I am going to have reconstruction work too…” and with a laugh she added, “I’ll probably have a better shape than before!” What an amazing attitude!

There were several times during the session that we both nearly burst in to tears. In fact, there are tears in my eyes now as I type…She asked me not to be too kind to her though, as she was trying so hard to cope…

I am going out for a walk to clear my head…I don’t know why these bad things happen to lovely ladies like Sue. She is a credit to herself, her family and her friends. She is a hero in my eyes and in inspiration. It certainly is a privilege to know that she comes to me for help and support.

I leave you with this poem …The Comfort of Friendship by Dinah Craik - taken from “In the company of Women” by Brenda Hunter PhD

Oh, the comfort-the inexpressible comfort

Of feeling safe with a person

Having neither to weigh thoughts, nor measure words-

But pouring them all out -

Just as they are -

Chaff and grain together -

Certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them

Keep what is worth keeping

And with the breath of kindness

Blow the rest away

Think of Sue on Monday…

Teeth Tips

Are you embarrassed by your teeth? Are you reluctant to smile for photos? According to BACD four out of five Britons as so embarrassed about their teeth they don’t smile for photographs.

I was at the dentist for a check up this week (am glad to report that I needed no work done other than a visit to the hygienist.) My dentist, Jon Shore asked me about teeth whitening, as I had made an enquiry at my previous appointment.

If I were to go down a route to improve the colour of my teeth, I certainly would have no hesitation in having the work carried out by Jon – he’s an excellent dentist. However, I have decided to follow a more natural approach first of all -“The White Smile Diet”. It has been devised by BACD – an organisation which promotes cosmetic dentistry in an ethical and educational fashion. Check out www.bacd.com for the full report.

Here are some simple ideas to brighten up your smile...my seven smile secrets...

1. Eat more raw vegetables – they help to remove surface stains on your teeth
2. Strawberries naturally whiten your teeth – and they give an attractive pink tint to the lips
3. To avoid staining and reduce your intake of red wine, coffee, soft drinks with strong colouring such as cola and sadly blueberries too - of these quickly stain the teeth
4. Sip through a straw – this reduces the contact with your teeth
5. Sugar free chewing gum can help stimulate saliva, which naturally cleans the surface your teeth
6. Baking powder can help to remove the build up of stains. It is recommended that twice a month you brush baking powder on your teeth as you would toothpaste and then rinse.
7. Don’t smoke – it stains your teeth - and in the long term will damage your gums

I would add a further tip:

Wear lipstick or lip gloss or balm. All of these products will enhance your smile and make you feel much better about yourself into the bargain. If you suffer from dry or cracked lips then first use a lip polish and follow with a nourishing quality lip balm - apply several times a day.

And have the confidence to smile it makes you and everyone around feel so much better! Go on….find someone to smile at now….even throw in a wink …and a laugh ...or chuckle… and let me know the results!

I’ve just smiled at my computer…and you know…I think he likes me!

Save 10%

On my desktop for positive people called, Cool Beans it says, “Save 10 % of all your income streams...”

This blog post idea came to me last night, when Catriona sent me a text asking me to electronically transfer another £50.00. Mmm ….perhaps a gap year in Australia and living apart from her mother means that our darling daughter may need ‘input’ and to be reminded that when she left she had the reputation of being excellent money manager!

And the Save 10% maxim seems a truism in today’s world, where the financial press is talking of major debt in the US – in its sub-prime sector. Now I am a simple lass with a good Scottish heritage of thrift woven into her basic character. Until this week I had never heard of the sub-prime sector and would not propose for a moment to advise on worldwide economies. However, I do understand straightforward profit and loss accounts and run my own company.

To quote Charles Dickens in Mr Micawber, “"Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen, nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery."

And as my quotation Cool Beans quote goes on to say, “Money is a tool… learn to be a craftsman…”

Save 10% is the yardstick that our children have been brought up on. Even when Kyle was working on a friend's farm milking cows as a young lad of twelve he was encouraged to save 10%. Even Catriona’s tips from Crewe Hall Hotel had a levy of 10% and we asked no less of ourselves. We overpaid on our mortgage by 10% for many years and yes you guessed…we no longer have mortgage…just imagine how good that feels! And anyone can be debt free …it only takes a plan and determination and 10%!

It may not always be easy however the result far outweighs any short term discomfort. And if the save 10% maxim becomes your life standard then you can prepare yourself for an amazing abundance.

I know that I cannot change the international money markets…however if we all aim to have “more month than money” then who knows maybe together we could influence a financial revolution!

As a non-expert, I knew that I needed more knowledge too – and so that is why this year Jay and I decided to take independent financial advice.

My Save 10% Tip today is – seek the advice of an independent financial advisor, perhaps one like Douglas Morrison, who came with a good recommendation. My brother-in-law, Jackie Muir, is a successful and wealthy man and he referred me to Douglas. Perhaps your bank or building society has recently offered you a financial review and that is a place to start, however that report will only reflect the products and services of that financial institution. So be independent and look for sound advice and compare the facts...

What good money tips do you have? Can you offer golden nuggets that could help us all?

Let me start another ball rolling (see Kath’s comment on Bouncy Black Ball)

Look forward to reading your tried and tested, simple money/energy/time 10% Tips…

In the Press - Just do it!

Kerry-Anne Clancy of the Sentinel Newspaper rang on Friday. She wanted to interview me for the business women’s section, Sentinelle. What a coincidence, as earlier in the week I had taken a call from Jo Kingston from GNN (Government News Network) to do with an article to be published in the UKTI's next Win Win magazine! Jo wanted me to be a case study based on my work in Dubai. How cool is that…never been an official case study before…

Both journalists were thoughtful and asked,

“Do you want a call back or are you happy to do it now, Eilidh?”

Ever eager, I replied, “Happy to go for it now, if you are…” as spontaneity is my speciality.

Plus in my experience, editors are always on tight deadlines and appreciate if you can accommodate them straight away. Both Jo & Kerry-Anne were very professional and made the interviews easy for me. They asked lots of searching questions and let’s face it I am a girl who speaks for a living, so it was great fun to supply the material for them. Good job they can both write fast!

I will post the press releases on the web site then you can read them at your leisure. (Sentinelle is due out on Tuesday and the United Kingdom Trade & Investment publication is due at the end of October.)

Kerry-Anne’s last question was,

“Do you have a short phrase or words of encouragement to anyone reading the business brief, Eilidh” …and my response was…

“You Can Do It!”

So whatever it is you need to do today just go for it and do it now…you know you can!

Let me know what you have decided to do…and if I can help in any way…just ask.

Look forward to reading your comments.

Race4Life

Today is Sunday and the day of rest in a Christian life. You may not be a Christian however I do hope you have a spiritual aspect to your world and set aside time to reflect.

I start every day by counting my blessings. Here I am doing it now…

If you have a blessed life then it is only right and proper that you look to ways that you can share your good fortune with others…and this makes me think of Edna.

Edna started as a ‘virtual client.’ She contacted me by email and arranged an appointment. And I am so grateful that she did, as Edna has proved to be an inspiration! She has been instrumental in me running in Race for Life, which is the UK’s biggest woman only fundraising event organised by Cancer Research.

And that was three years ago…and when I count my blessings I include Edna. She is a very special lady, who does so much for other people. Edna started competing in 2004, when she had recovered from breast cancer. Edna is a survivor with spirit. She is also an organiser, so now her good friend Gill and I are entered in the competition, supplied with our packs, tea shirts and this year she even planned a picnic in the park for after the race…and submitted all our donations online!

I can totally recommend taking part in the event. It is an emotional as well as physical experience that leaves a lasting impression. Races take place all over the country. Just Google ‘raceforlife’ and find out more. Plan now to ensure you get involved next year. Incidentally, you do not have to ‘run’ - many women walk.

However, there are lots of other ways that we can contribute to making the world a better place…I would love to hear your ideas and suggestions. Tell us your story.

And take a few moments to contemplate… life is a journey to be savoured…and may your God be with you today.

Bouncy Black Ball

Never thought that I would buy an exercise ball…the fact that I did so within a matter of hours proves the power of a good recommendation…

I first met Kath, when I was running an inset training day at her school. Sometime later she came to the Studio for Colour Coaching and I am now pleased to count her as a good friend and so much more than a client.

Kath has a waist to die for…in fact a figure to die for … she’s a very pretty, strawberry blond ‘spring’ lady…and yesterday, when she called for cosmetics, I asked her what her secret was…

Let me share Kath’s secret of a slim waist with you now…

Kath has balls…well in this case an exercise ball to be exact…

Poor lady has had severe back problems over the years, culminating in major surgery earlier this spring. So I was right in my initial statement that this girl has guts! She has been through the mill with her spinal challenges. So, I reckoned that if Kath could manage an exercise routine using a big bouncy ball so could I. Let’s face it she has a tummy as flat as an ironing board and for health reasons if no other that is something to aspire to! (See Blog entry - Take the Tummy Test)

Never one to hang about, I was off to town to purchase mine within a couple of hours…Kath did mention in the passing that worst part was pumping up the ball…and she wasn’t joking either. It must have taken me and bicycle pump more than thirty minutes to inflate the darned thing.

I am sure it will be worth the effort. So that was my extra exercise for yesterday.

Will keep you posted as to how me and my big black ball get along…and maybe Kath will post regular comments and words of encouragement and tips for all us ‘ball novices’…

My goal sheet which is posted on the back of my bedroom door, keeps reminding me every morning… “Fit as a flea for Catriona’s return!” - Just eighteen days, I am a girl on a slimming / trimming mission!

Do you have exercise ideas to share? Stories of success or failure with exercise equipment…we would love your comments…

Time for a Style Revolution

When I qualified as a teacher, twin sets and pearls were in vogue in fact this was probably the mandatory dress code. That was decades ago! So it's time to ditch the twin sets! Are some parts of your wardrobe in a time warp? Have your cosmetics passed their shelf life?

If so, it’s time for a serious review. Time to tip all your clothes on to the bed and only put back the items that you have worn in the past twelve months. The outfits remaining on the bed can probably be donated to charity, especially if they do not fit or are the wrong colour.

No doubt the twin set will in time re-invent itself and return in a new and improved version, but now is not the time. Maybe the Italians or the French will embrace it and bring the outfit back with panache? Perhaps ‘Pringle’ can re-invent its brand like ‘Burberry’ which has witnessed outstanding success recently.

Fact is when we think of British fashion what do we tend to think of? Tweeds, cashmeres, tartans and twin sets…Certainly I think this is how foreigners see us. Of course British fashion is much broader and more adventurous nowadays and we do have excellent designers such as Jasper Conran, John Rocha and Paul Smith to thank for much of this.

Now you were born an original... so why die a copy? Let's create your own personal style and 'brand.' Be yourself and love your life and who you are.

Catriona sent me a book of 'Pocket Positives' from Australia. (we have not seen our daughter for over a year now! And this little book has been a joy to keep me upbeat.)

Here is a Zig Ziglar quotation taken from it:

“Our problem is that we make the mistake of comparing ourselves with other people. You are not inferior or superior to any human being…You do not determine your success by comparing yourself to others, rather you determine your succes by comparing your accomplishments to your capabilities. You are ‘Number One’ when you do the best with what you have.” Zig Ziglar, America motivation author.

If you need help to create your own unique style and image then contact an expert.
Impression Management Unlimited is here to help. Look forward to hearing from you...

PS Catriona is home in 19 sleeps and get ups!

Hot Air & Cake Crumbs

It's one of those phrases you don't easily forget, "Hot air and cake crumbs". Delivered with exasperation well over a decade ago by a German friend and colleague of mine when we were both living in the south of France, working at IBM's telecommunications research laboratory, not far from Nice. Horst Garus took great pride in his studying of language and was particularly proud of his idiomatic use of English - however, this particular phrase came out of the blue - and yet Horst delivered it with such belief that I automatically integrated it into my own idioms as if I'd been using if for a lifetime. He explained later that it was a literal translation from German and he just assumed it would work - and I'm pretty sure that if we took a poll across our readership right now, we'd have close agreement regarding its meaning.

Why not post a comment telling us what you think it means?

Some of these literal translations work better than others. For example, I used to wonder why French parents referred to their children as "... my little cauliflowers...", until I remembered my own Mother coming up with "...chicken-lamb-kins..." (or however it's supposed to be written).

And the point of all this?

The point is this: communication's a funny thing, because every day we're presented with a dichotomy. On the one hand we are required to be very precise in our use of language in order to ensure the correct meaning is transmitted, while on the other, what appears as border line waffle gets the precise message across nicely.

Did I know what Horst meant when he labelled a fellow colleague's efforts as, "hot air and cake crumbs"? You betcha. And did I know who "chicken-lamb-kins" was? You betcha.

However, over the next couple of days and just for a bit of fun count the number of times you find the possessive apostrophe incorrectly applied - my pound to your penny that it'll outweigh the correct usages and I think that's pretty sad.

"Eats Shoots & Leaves" by Lynne Truss should be compulsory reading for all.

Wide Awake at Three o’clock in the Morning…

I wonder how many students were concerned and worried about their exam results today.

Have you ever lost sleep due to anxiety or a feeling of uneasiness?

We have all spent a restless night or two; however we do not want to make it a habit.

Perhaps six times a year, I have less sleep that than I normally do. I have found that trying to get to sleep seldom helps. However, I am not a natural worrier so this situation does not concern me. I accept that on these occasions I am maybe only going to have four hours sleep. I get up – I do not want to disturb my husband. I make a cup of tea or milk drink and sit quietly. Occasionally, I read other times I type an email and often I sit quietly and write. Sometimes, after a while I feel sleepy and return to bed; at other times I stay up all night knowing that I can take a power snooze of twenty minutes in the middle of the day.

Coaching clients from time to time report that they have sleeping problems.

And so here are Eilidh’s Six Sleep Tips for You:

1. Think happy thoughts. Read a positive page before you sleep. Avoid late night news and violent TV programmes. I was talking to a client recently, who had had a horrid nightmare. It had involved a young child and a bus. The news that day had been full of the tragic death of a little girl, whose parents had beaten her so badly that the coroner’s report stated that her injuries were similar to a child that had been run over. It was no coincidence that her dream reflected her uppermost thoughts before she went to sleep.
2. Look at the big picture and do not worry about incidentals over which you have no control.
3. Talk over any worries that you have and clear your mind. Ask yourself: "What are the odds against this thing's happening at all?" Use the law of averages to counteract your problem.
4. Use visualisation – imagine the worry as something that you can put in a box…do just that…close the lid ...and bury it!
5. Write down all your issues and troubles until you clear your mind.
6. Set a time limit. If you are determined to worry about something, then agree a time in your mind. Say, ok I will worry about this for three minutes. Then refuse to give it any more time and then bury the thought.

Goodnight and sweet dreams!

Take the Tummy Test

For many people, the middle-aged spread is as much a part of getting older as laughter lines, and receding hairlines. But research suggests that even the smallest of pot bellies may be a serious health risk. The Times August 14^th page 2 has a very interesting article. The headline reads, Tummy test signals heart risks ahead.

“Dr James de Lemos said: “In our thirties and forties, we often gain three to four inches in the midsection. It’s a day-to-day, meal-to-meal battle, but it’s worth fighting. We don’t have to clean our plates. It’s better to throw food out than add it to our waists. Even a small pot belly puts us at higher risk when compared to a flat tummy.”

He added, “Researchers examined the relationship between body shape and early signs of disease in the arteries. They found that the likelihood of there being calcium deposits in the arteries grew in direct proportion to the increase in waist-to-hip ratio.

June Davison, cardiac nurse at the British Heart Foundation, said: “People who are overweight or obese have an increased risk of developing heart disease. The risks are even higher when fat is mainly concentrated around the abdomen.”

And I agree from the point of creating a good impression too. It is very important that we take a holistic approach. We need to consider our overall body shape and general health and well-being as well as our weight.

Take the test:

• To calculate your waist-hip ratio, use a tape measure to find the size of your waist (measure at the mid-point between the bottom of your ribs and the top of your hips) and then measure your hips.
• Divide the first number by the second.
• For men, a healthy ratio is under 1.0 and for women it is under 0.85
• Above that point the higher the ratio, the more your heart is at risk
• A man’s health is also at risk if the circumference of waist is more than 37 inches (94cm) and at a high risk if it exceeds 40 inches (102 cm)
• For women these figures are 32 inches (80cm) and 35 inches (88cm)

"Come on Mel, let’s get out the tape measure and stand of the scales; draw up a diet plan and exercise routine. We can do it!" Wish us well!

PS And guess who lost another 1lb! Happy Days!

Daughter keeps mother thinking thin!

Mel made an appointment for Friday. “I need to do something about my weight and my waistline,” she stated. “Can you help me Eilidh?”

“It would be a pleasure,” I replied. I know how she feels!

Our daughter, Catriona returns home from her gap year in Australia as a size 8/10. How nice for her! I have not seen her for over a year now and she left at a 10/12 - a very beautiful rounded, curvaceous yet trim nineteen year old.

Now I know it says on my goal sheet:

Be as fit as a flea for Cat’s return …

But that was written in January and I seem to have lost my focus. So I am on an exercise and weight loss regime for the next thirty days and it is going to be great to work with Mel. We will support and motivate each other. Catriona is encouraging me and sends a daily text. Today’s suggestion was that I do more housework and hoovering! Don’t you just love that girl!

My actions thus far:

1. Taking a brisk walk early each morning and bike ride in the evening (each activity lasts about 20 twenty minutes)
2. Decreasing carbohydrates such as bread, potatoes - less brown rice and pasta too
   
3. Increasing proteins such a fish, chicken and steak
4. Eating lecithin with E as it acts as a natural emulsifier of fatty substances and kelp as it is important to the thyroid gland in helping to regulate the body's metabolic rate

Have already lost three pounds!

No doubt this loss has been aided by the fact that I have cut out wine, chocolate and deserts…yes, you guessed…my husband, Jay is off on his adventures again!

Log on tomorrow and read what the experts say and take the test...

Waitrose & Woodward
And Associations

Do you ever read a magazine starting at the back? Some cultures that do of course, however Western publications assume that we will start at the beginning with page one. Well, I often work in reverse and flick through starting at the back.

Recently, I was reading the 100^th Issue Special Edition of the Waitrose Food Illustrated. I popped it in my trolley, because there was an interview with Edward Woodward on the inside back page of the periodical. Our family has a happy and positive memory of Mr Woodward, so I wanted to read the article -good marketing on behalf of the publishers.

When our son, Kyle was nine years old he wanted to earn some money for his first computer. After discounting newspapers deliveries, car washing and garden tidying due to poor remuneration, he opted to be a model.

“Get me in to that!” he announced one day, as he sat amused and entertained by a young lad on a TV commercial for Trio chocolate biscuits.

“He earns lots of money for doing that doesn’t he?” asked our number one son. (We only have one son!)

When Kyle was reassured that yes, he, Kyle Parlan McArthur Milnes, would be paid handsomely for appearing on TV he made a further announcement that he was going to model on TV!

"Get me into that now, mum!" he announced.

And guess what? Two years later he was on TV! He was invited by MMA to model Harrods' exclusive suits for young men on the Good Morning programme. He was very excited to see himself on the television and loved the whole experience. We were very proud of him. He was so confident and capable for one so young. And it was at this event that Kyle met Edward Woodward. As a result , the Milnes family has a very happy, positive association and memory of spending time in the company of this well known British actor.

What do people associate with you? Are you a premier brand like Harrods? Do people bring you to mind and think …quality…first class…great… kind...caring..loving...
When people remember you ten years from now what will they be thinking?
Most importantly, what do you want people to think of you…remember you were born unique so don’t die a poor copy!

Kyle certainly is an original. He started his first computer business at seventeen and I know that when people think of him they think…talented, creative, hard working, focused and fun to be with…and of course very handsome…but then he was associated with modelling for Harrods now wasn’t he?!

They last question the magazine interviewer asked Edward Woodward was, “What would your last meal be?” My last questions to you are in a similar vein,

“What will people associate with you? What will be your lasting impression?”

Pity Parties
And doing things differently

I have been taking care of my customers for over fifteen years. I like to do things differently. My clients are very special people…they may not be on the A-list; however they are all stars in my eyes and I treat them accordingly.

Not many therapists welcome clients into their homes…but I do. When you walk into the sun lounge studio the mood is bright and cheerful. You are offered chilled filtered water, coffee or a fruit tea. Or as in the case of Helen - a hot chocolate with double cream! And perhaps we share a joke or two, or talk about our families, holidays and shared experiences.

My mother was a very grounded individual and her unconditional love has given me a great feel and love for life. I never get down in the dumps. I am very upbeat. Stuff happens to us all. We all get what I call ‘life attacks’ so we just have to get on with our situations. When things go wrong, I talk myself back in to my space…my own happy unique space. And then I can share my happy spirit with others.

I like to think that an appointment with me is ‘an emotional experience’ for my customers. My aim is to deliver a first class service with the professional ear of a coach. I offer stability; a safe environment where customers can share their news and views and address any concerns in total confidence. For me, this is very important.

If a client leaves me feeling happier about themselves and laughing… then I am happy. If they go away with relaxed faces, looking good and feeling great, then I have done my job. My loyal customers become friends and they tell me that coming to the Studio is more like visiting a close confidante than a therapist or colour coach. In the words of a Lorna, a delightful client, “Eilidh makes me feel like part of her family!”

Clients have all sorts of personal issues when they walk through the Studio door. And at this moment in time I am thinking of Gill… and so many other girls like her. Their dream is to be a mum. Not too much to ask surely? And yet, for some reason motherhood eludes them. All of their circumstances are different, as are their backgrounds however they share the same deep desire to be pregnant.

This seems to be a much more common complaint nowadays. There is good treatment available and perhaps it does add some reassurance to know that other women have the same challenges. However, I find myself saying; “There but for the grace of God go I.”

It is a very hard road to go down. And Gill has been on her path for eight years now and getting panicky if not desperate, as this could be her last attempt at fertilisation.

During Gill's session, we talked and talked. My key coaching points to her this morning were:

1. Avoid pity parties

Avoiding negative people who want to add their woes and troubles to an already burdened soul is essential. This is doubly hard for Gilly as she is a very giving, kind and thoughtful practitioner working within the NHS. She needs to be selfish for a few months, to say ‘no!’ at times and to focus on her own needs.

2. Do not feel guilty

Gill feels guilty as she does not have the energy or time that she has had in the past to give to her aging parents at the moment. So we made an acrostic for guilty!

Give

U – yourself

Indulgent

Leisure

Time

YES! Yippee! Yahoo!

Why not bear this in mind next time you feel inappropriately guilty? Look at guilt from a different perspective.

It works for me…and many of my clients...

And a final thought, it says on my Cool Beans ™ Desktop, “It is a privilege to be a parent…” these words seem so true, when I meet clients in Gill’s situation.

Let’s wish Gill and all the girls and guys, who just want to me mums and dads, all the best of luck in their pursuit of parenthood.

Ghostly to Great in Four Simple Steps

“I feel as white as a ghost,” said Sally. She was in the Salon for some pampering. Well I say pampering; does a leg wax fall in to this category? What do you reckon? Mmm on reflection a debateable point perhaps? Although when she walked in with a support on her left leg from ankle to knee I did wonder if she was in for a leg wax i.e. in the singular!

Fact is, Sally needed a pamper treatment as she is still on crutches after a series of mishaps. She suffers from a bone condition similar to that of brittle bone and in the years that I have known her she must have had 6 or 7 breaks. I am frankly amazed by her positive, chirpy outlook and it is always a pleasure to see her.

Going back to the ‘ghostly’ title, Sally felt that she looked pale and tired. She requested a repeat of her foundation. We decided to do a colour test to ensure the correct shade. Sally was happy to leave at this point…

However, not so quickly lady… Eilidh loves to play with cosmetics… and I had time before my next client… so we applied the self defining sheer shade of ‘Cameo,’ which is perfect for a Summer/Cool skin toned client….then a little all over lustre bronzer applied with a superb Kabuki brush and topped off with a gloss stick in a pink shade called ‘Wish.’

Result in less than five minutes? Cool Beans baby!

And Sally looked ghostly no more! She appeared radiant and happy. Her partner, Dave
( ds@dsphoto.co.uk) who is a photographer said,

“Wow! You look great, Sal!” And he is a professional!

So it you want to look great as opposed to ghostly in less than five minutes then it is a four step process:

1. Ensure that your skin is moisturised (assuming it is already cleansed and toned!)
2. Apply a light covering of a self defining and sheer foundation
3. Add an all over application of a skin-toned bronze
4. Top off with a gloss lipstick in the correct shade for your seasonal colour

To Colour or not To Colour?

That is the question... (Today, I am moving all 5 entries from my web-page www.yourcoolbeans.com)

So to that question...

Yesterday I called a client, Rita...
Rita like many other new customers came to the Studio as a direct result of a super two-page centre spread article, which the 'Sentinel' newspaper had run on our business. We had not spoken for sometime and I had a particular promotion that I wanted to share with her.

Lawther Murchison is a first class colour coach, who works in the Studio with me. Clients adore her! She is caring and professional. When we first met Rita, she was very confused about what best colours to wear - poor lady had been colour analysed a number of times with different results. It was our job to reassure and explain in detail what she needed to know.

Rita had a specific issue with the colour of her hair. It was turning what appeared to be grey and she did not know what to do for the best. Her challenge was that hairdressers were doing full head colour and over the years there were not many shades she had not tried! The result was total confusion and hair that needed TLC! Lawther has a great deal of experience with hair colouring as until very recently, she had her own salon situated within one of the top hair dressing establishments on the West Coast of Scotland. She suggested low lights with an ash base as Rita suits cool based colours.

As a cool or winter seasoned person you can enhance of hair colour to emphasise and dramatise the natural colouring of your hair - always remembering to avoid gold, red or copper tones.

The challenge is the time that it takes to undergo the necessary changes and not everyone can bear the somewhat painful process. Well done to Rita, apparently she is now a stunning silver and I can't wait to see her again. So bear in mind that the rewards are definitely worth it!

I know this only too well. My personal experience goes back fifteen years. But that is a story for another day....

Handbags and Hip Bones!

Confidence, Image & Style
10 August 2007
Some time ago, I was speaking at a conference in the Lake District. The topic was 'Confidence, Image & Style!'

During the presentation we covered such areas as my 'Top Ten Tips' to make the right impression every time...
I recall making a kind of through away comment i.e. "Your handbag should always fit inside your pelvic bones!"

And I cannot believe how many delegates picked up on the statement! It gets quoted back to me time and time again.

The reasoning behind this fact is that a small framed person cannot successfully carry a large bag or briefcase...unless you want that item to make the statement and been seen first. Most men and women want to see and be seen as themselves - not as the person who was carrying a huge black bag! (a new context for the bag lady?!)
So larger people - larger bags....smaller people - smaller bags. Simple guideline.

Proof of this was? When brand Beckham landed in America and Victoria was first seen giving her interviews; her handbag was way out of proportion and her over-sized pink bag is all I can really remember of the photograph. Not what she would want me to commit to memory I suspect.
Perhaps her thinking was that the big, statement, oversized, brand named bag added style - Victoria certainly has her own unique personal idea of that. Maybe she thought it made her looked thinner as this appears to be an issue with her. Not so.

For most people a good yardstick is - if the bag or briefcase fits within the pelvic bones then the image created will be one of balance. You want to wear the handbag and be the dominant impression - not vice versa. Who would want the handbag to be wearing them?

From the point of health and wellbeing it is also sensible to have a smaller bag or case - if you carry less you will have less wear and tear on your back.